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eBook ´ Heads in Beds A Reckless Memoir of Hotels Hustles and So

In the tradition of Kitchen Confidential and Waiter Rant a rollicking eye opening fantastically indiscreet memoir of a life spent and misspent in the hotel industry Jacob Tomsky never intended to go into the hotel business As a new college graduate armed only with a philosophy degree and a singular lack of career direction he became a valet parker for a large luxury hotel in New Orleans Yet rising fast through the ranks he ended up working in “hospitality” for than a decade doing everything from supervising the housekeeping department to manning the front desk at an upscale Manhattan hotel He’s checked you in checked you out separated your white panties from the white bed sheets parked your car tasted your room service meals cleaned your toilet denied you a late checkout given you a wake up call eaten MM's out of your minibar laughed at your jokes and taken your money In Heads in Beds he pulls back the curtain to expose the crazy and compelling reality of a multi billion dollar industry we think we know Heads in Beds is a funny authentic and irreverent chronicle of the highs and lows of hotel life told by a keenly observant insider who’s seen it all Prepare to be amused shocked and amazed as he spills the unwritten code of the bellhops the antics that go on in the valet parking garage the housekeeping department’s dirty little secrets—not to mention the shameless activities of the guests who are rarely on their best behavior Prepare to be moved too by his candor about what it’s like to toil in a highly demanding service industry at the luxury level where people expect to get what they pay for and often a whole lot Employees are poorly paid and frequently abused by coworkers and guests alike and maintaining a semblance of sanity is a daily challengeAlong his journey Tomsky also reveals the secrets of the industry offering easy ways to get what you need from your hotel without any hassle This book and a timely proffered twenty dollar bill will help you score late checkouts and upgrades get free stuff galore and make that pay per view charge magically disappear Thanks to him you’ll know how to get the very best service from any business that makes its money from putting heads in beds Or at the very least you will keep the bellmen from taking your luggage into the camera free back office and bashing it against the wall repeatedly

10 thoughts on “Heads in Beds A Reckless Memoir of Hotels Hustles and So Called Hospitality

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    Hotels have no thirteenth floor hence I have no thirteenth chapter I'm guessing there's at least one person who's reading this review that has never noticed most hotel elevators don't have a button for floor number 13 Dear Author I had fun reading your book than I have had reading memoirs from actual comedians A trashy errr classy girl like me really vibes on your kind of humor Please ignore the fact that I just reviewed a book for being too brash and crude You sir are nothing of the sort Your specific brand of humor may be too much for some but I was dying over here in my little reading zone Dying in a good way that is I'd say we should hang out but you want cash not nipple slips Dammit I'm kind of short on cash at the momentTalk about a great voice Everything was told like it happened and if there were embellishments we'll never know I appreciate that Hell to the yes this book was funny in the sort of way that only guys who have gone through crap and have come out on the other side can be And don't forget helpful Helpful funny good deal What exactly is Head in Bedwhoops I meant Heads in Beds about?This is an irreverent look at what exactly goes on behind the scenes in the hotel industry And boy does stuff go on I found bondage gear still attached to the towel holder that had been ripped out of the wall the prisoner escaped I suppose wandering the hallways in a ball gagI've seen footage of close packed fistfights in a rising elevator incredibly confined and extremely interesting to watch especially if there are unrelated people along for the ride backs pushed against the wall and hands protectively raised before their facesYeah i'm in room 1205 I accidentally ordered a movie Can you take it off the bill?Certainly sirOver to the movie console to cancel porn name removed because it might offend someone but it made me laugh hard two minutes and seven seconds into playback I guess the opening credits were sufficientWorry not The systems have changed and we can no longer see the movie titles I mean we know that the new releases cost 1295 and the sexual releases cost 1495 We just no longer have access to your specific fetishes Not that we judge you LIEThere were celebrity antics aplenty We had a few working class celebrities nice guys like Tony Danza who stuck it out because the bellmen here weren't afraid to scream Ayo Toneee when he would swagger into the lobby and you could tell Danza loved that shitTips? You want tips? Here's one Don't drink from the in room glasses Certainly not all but some of them were using furniture polish on the drinking glasses Keeping those glasses clean looking was also part of the job Do you see any dish soap on a housekeeping cart? So the next time you put a little tap water into the minibar glass and wonder to yourself why it has a pleasant lemon aftertaste that's because you just took a shot of PledgeI liked how each new story sort of came with its own built in tip for how to get what you want during your hotel stay The glossaries at the end were also priceless Loved this book and loved the PoV Good luck in your future endeavors Mr Author Don't forget where you came from Tommy I never have Valet 4 Life motherfuckersThis book was provided from the publisher through Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review